最近在看，也很喜欢的戏剧就是炎亚纶和鬼鬼演的 <霹雳MIT>。这是一部关于天才侦探的戏剧。真的很好看~ 想当然，这位天才侦探就是炎亚纶啊。
一开始就满喜欢炎亚纶的我，看了这部戏的感觉是对他更喜欢，也更心疼。我想，没有人会比他更适合演MIT的男主角 - 007 詹士德吧。007冷静的外表下，藏着一颗不为认知的脆弱心灵。有时看着看着，我都不知道看的那个人是007还是炎亚纶。因为同样的，亚纶那看似帅气冷酷的外表下是存在着多么令人心碎的人生经历。我想，原本就很忧郁的亚纶，因为007而变得更忧郁了吧。。。只是他一向都不愿意向别人承认自己的脆弱，所以总是阳光着。到底是一个怎么样的人生经历会让一个22岁的男孩变得如此忧郁? 这其中的绝大部分的原因不是人人口中的“想太多”，而是真的体验过对人类的失望。我想我之所以会因为007而更喜欢亚纶，是因为我看到了更真实的炎亚纶。 炎亚纶，我想我能够真的认同你的心情，因为我也正在经历。有很多人会说，为什么他总是轻易流泪，轻易感伤。人生有必要那么灰暗吗? 但我想如果你是他，你或许根本会比他更来得脆弱。他其实是坚强的，坚强得让人觉得到底你的心里隐藏了什么。在一个人的人生中，短短的3年陆续失去身边最在乎的人；前女朋友，好朋友，外公。如果是你，会怎么样呢? 所以别再说，他的眼泪是轻易流下的，那并不是。那是需要经历多少心碎的眼泪。我相信20岁之前的亚纶和一般年轻人是没什么不同的；青春，阳光用在他身上曾经那么适合。脆弱的不是亚纶的性格，脆弱的是环境，是这个世界。 这个世界是脆弱的可能下一秒就会改变，任何人都阻止不了。
我不再相信这个世界。16岁以前的我也是一样快乐；就算身边有一些让我很不开心的事也没让我对这个世界，对人类失去信任和希望。没有，不过16岁以后的我改变了。你们可以说是成长；我无所谓。什么原因都好，也不能否认我的确变了的事实。这3年里，经历了太多太多；一个朋友的离去让我觉得原来永别可以那么靠近，不再是遥远的，甚至曾经和你很要好，和你一起长大的一些人都是可以毫无预兆的变得陌生。两年前爸爸的住院和经济负担让我瞬间长大；让我明白即使我多么想过得简单，我也没有办法放下一切过得简单，因为我的家里在未来是需要我的，因为这样所以在朋友强调简单生活的时候，我知道我不能简单。要怎么让我的家过得好才更重要吧。。。其实，对于未来除了期待，我更多的是无奈和害怕吧。世界和环境一直不断的改变我们；但至少我还有力量维持坚强。我会努力加油! 就算是自己一个人，也要坚强! 不管是大东或是亚纶，让我一样认同和喜欢的就是他们在面对别人时的坚强，可是也有勇气面对自己的脆弱。他们不怕流下被男人认为最珍贵的眼泪，因为他们知道流过的泪是一种提醒，提醒着他们哭过以后会更坚强。勇敢面对自己的伤口，再勇敢的站起来，其实他们的眼泪很有意义喔~
要看霹雳MIT @ Mysterious Incredible Terminator!
I confessed my love for BABY at
1:29 AM
YYY
Monday, December 15, 2008
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*160*
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Hi pple, before I disappeared for don't-know-how-many-donkey-years, I will update! Hmms, so holidays had finally arrived after so much anticipation! I'm really in this holiday mood now, not wanting to do anything else! But finally, IEP implementations are over, let's hope market research will be over soon too, and please no hiccups! Being leader for a major assignment is really a sian thing, but not knowing why, the process of conducting market research kind of interest me a little (except for the survey-ing). =P oh ya, IEP supervision is a huge success too! My intervention 4, though not really that great, but ended pretty well too! Lots of assignments to be done, but hey...where's the mood??Been thinking through really alot too. Got a lot of things wanna express, but I totally don't know where to start like seriously. Hmms, I still thinks words are better expressed using chinese; chinese holds more meaningful words....but then, I'm lazy to type in chinese. So pardon me, you may not understand what I am talking about. .... know what? I really hate missing someone! It's so painful and I don't feel like myself at all! I didn't used to miss you that much, I didn't used to realise your importance that much, I didn't used to wanting to talk to you that much, I didn't used to look forward to your sms that much, I didn't used to anticipate seeing you that much. For all the past 12 years, I didn't used to experience all that! It was you, who experienced. And now, i very much knows how it feels like now! And yes, it is a total sucky feeling!Not that I didn't experienced missing and liking someone before, I did and was rather a memorable one. But the feeling was so different. Why different? Because you were the one who showered me with love and concern each time I looked into your eyes, because you were the one who understands me, because you were the one who never failed to be there, because you were the one who care about me more than anybody else did....because you ARE the one now. I don't know whether you will still be what you used to be, but I do still feel your love and concern, I do still feel that you care alot...each time I feel that I'm not important to you, you gave me a message, a simple one but at the right moment. Just a message for me to know that you remembers me. Each time I need comfort, your message came in. Why? Just so for me to know how you feel. If yes, why do I still feel so unsecured.will you still be there each time I need you? I know it isn't your fault that you couldn't be here, but I need the sense of assurance. Sorry that I couldn't give you my whole trust, make it this way...the one that I couldn't trust is myself. I don't have the confidence that after 12 years, you will still love me like you used to, I don't have the confidence that you will always be here like what you used to say. Life is so much like a drama~ this is a true saying. For someone I onced like so much, so much that I thought I would never like anybody else that much, I gave up you and you were hurt. After 6 years, that guy hurt me so badly and left. We weren't together, yes we weren't but the pain was not any lighter. Could you ever imagine someone you like so much telling you to give up and not wait anymore. It was a true stab at the heart, but through this stab, I finally saw your true heart, finally understood that the only person who will stay is you....finally realised that perhaps you meant the most afterall. I was too young to understand this back then. But things changed. You've been hurt, so were i. Two persons who had been hurt so terribly before, could never said the true words again. Those innocent but very true confessions, I will never hear from you again. Your heart didn't change, I know that. But I know better, your heart has a wound unhealed. Should i tell you? What if it means I gonna lose you?
I confessed my love for BABY at
11:28 PM
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